pic credit: Stuart Miles

Resilience has been described as

  • the competence to overcome obstacles,
  • the will to never give up,
  • the ability to reach one’s goals despite setbacks,
  • the power to learn from mistakes and adapt to change, as well as
  • an important indicator for mental health.

Resilience does not mean cold-heartedness, ignorance, absence of or dismissing of emotions. Rather, it is the indicator of how we deal with our crises, choose our reactions, employ our coping strategies, and approach the future.

Everyone faces challenges in life, and everyone is entitled to define the level of crisis for themselves according to how they experience it. Resilience helps with your state of mind, the mood you’re in, and it’s a good way to go if you want to prevent or help with depression.

Let it also be known that no level of resilience will prevent you from ever having a bad day. But you have choices: you are responsible for your life and for the actions you take. It is your choice what you think about a situation, how you react to it, and how you deal with its outcome. You choose to be upset just like you can make the conscious decision to be happy. I've put my foot in it I don't know how many times. But if we pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off and try it again, the experience will be put to good use. We learn from our mistakes, and try, try again, which, ladies and gentlemen, translates into resilience.

As you learn more about yourself, and as you learn to accept yourself as you are, you will strengthen your self-esteem and self-confidence. It is from this confidence in yourself that you will find the confidence to trust others and the world around you. This trust will enable you to see the positive side of things and develop an optimistic outlook towards the future. Although bad things happen, they hold in themselves lessons you were meant to learn in order to grow and make you the person you are meant to be. With resilience you will learn to accept what life throws at you without losing your footing.

It is alright to want to take responsibility and deal with things by yourself, but your resilience will benefit if you let others in. Build a circle of people you trust, ask them for help and then accept the assistance they offer. You may not have learned this particular lesson in your childhood, but it is not too late to make a start now – you’ve already found your way here, haven’t you?

For more tips and strategies, the American Psychological Association has outlined The Road to Resilience here.